Churros in “Churrono”

It’s been a week since I have been here and there’s not a day that goes by that I haven’t been extremely exhausted come the end of the day!

Arriving, I was deathly tired from the night before. A bunch of my awesome friends came out to bid me a farewell and good luck the Winnipeg way, or alcoholics’ way, or psychotics’ way – I have yet to decide. Basically I was served a shit-load of shots in the course of four hours, making the morning of my departure extremely difficult and painful.

Every other night I’ve been exhausted from a full day’s worth of exploring and trying to get familiar with my new home. I’ve tested out the subway lines, tried gyms in the area, ventured off through the streets of downtown alone, and pick destinations and try and see if I can make it there and back.

Yes I’ve been lost and confused at times, but it’s all part of the experience right?

Here are 6ix things that I’ve noticed in my first week here:

One: Ain’t no body got time for that. Like actually!

People here take their time seriously, especially in downtown. If you’re slow or holding up a line, you better be prepared to hear the huffing from people behind you or as they try and manoeuvre themselves around and in front of you. Like, sorry if I was entering my calories into MyFitnessPal as I came up from under the subway.

Anyways, if you make the same mistake of walking sluggishly as you chose a selfie filter for your next post, or clip your toe nails as you walk through a well travelled area, try and stick to the right side of the path. Sure, you’ll still be considered slow AF, but at least this way you’re not also preventing people who are in a rush to be, probably nowhere.

Two: Squirrels

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What the actual fuck is up with that? Here they’re bigger, they’re blacker, and they’re bolder. Fuck that!

I was minding my own business just taking everything in and thinking to myself, “Wow dude, you did it – you moved and now you’re actually here.”

That moment was short lived when what looked like a rat or a poodle or whatever decided to dart across my path about a foot in front of me. When the black blur finally stopped and got a good look, it was the ugliest fucker I have ever seen to call itself a squirrel! It even had bald spots – from fighting other squirrels, I was told later.

Three: I live in “Churrono”

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I read 25 Hacks to make your life easier in Toronto posted by blogTO and thought it was funny when I read their first hack:

It’s pronounced “Churrono” not “Tor-on-to”: the quicker you lose the proper pronunciation, the quicker people will think you’re a local.

This is funny and true — it’s something I quickly learned even before I read the post. I don’t know how long it will take before I am pronouncing it like a local, but right now I am halfway there: “Turonno.”

Four: Socket or suck it!

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If you’re out and about and plan to do some work on a laptop or just charge your phone at a coffee shop, I bid you the best of luck! If you’re not one of the lucky ones that manage to secure a spot by an unused socket then you just have to, well, suck it!

You will always see every other person twirling around and scanning every part of each wall as they try and locate a place to plug in — I am one of those. Finding one is like gold though!

It’s also funny to see cords running across the floors, over planters and room partitions, and under chairs. I got one today at the Second Cup close to home, and seriously, everyone else can suck it! I am good!

Five: “Churrets” in “Churrono”

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This is my godson eating churros at Kensington Market. This has nothing to do with the subject, but I wasn’t about to take a person who had “churrets”

Pronouncing turrets, “churrets” — I don’t, and I hope no one does. I just thought it was a funny header.

But yeah, it’s not just a thing you see on TV. On my first few days here even, I’ve been startled by people with turrets on the TTC.

My first experience, it was a little past midnight and I was waiting for the subway line 1 going northbound to Finch at the Lawrence Station. I had decided to lean on the pillar because I was so exhausted. A man was standing on the opposite side of the pillar and he looked pretty normal. That’s of course before he decided start yelling out, “Jehovah is evil. Beast. God. All Christ. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck!”

I was so caught off guard mainly because it was so quiet before that. When we got on the subway, he continued to scream these words all the way down through all the cars until we got to the final stop about four stations later.

Another time it was midday and I was sitting on the subway and I heard something like a banshee sounds from afar. I wasn’t sure what it was but it was coming closer by the second. Pretty soon I noticed some woman basically walking through the cars, dragging her feet, and yelling out repetitively, “Help me, help me! Money!”

As quick and as loud as she appeared from my left, she disappeared on my right.

There have been a few more incidents, but you get the point.

6ix: Fork drop. Diet drop.

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Chinese food from Kenny’s Noodle

If there’s anything you take from this post of my first personal experiences and opinions, take this: the food here is insane!

Because Toronto is such a mixing pot of many different cultures, theres a mixing pot of many different taste pallets and rightfully, the accompanying flavours that satisfy them. All you need is money and an adventurous tongue — for food of course!

From authentic Chinese food, to Jamaican, Filipino, Ethiopian, Italian, Korean, Vulcan, whatever you’re craving — they have it all! There are also so many different food trends from all over the world that are popping up everywhere!

Let me just rollover to the next post!

 

 

 

 

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End of September, beginning of Falls

It looks like one of the first things I will be checking off my list as an Ontarian – I am sure I am not even allowed to call myself that for a few years – will be touring Niagara Falls. Since my touchdown in Ontario will be in Hamilton, my sponsoring Toronto family (I will talk about them later) will be visiting Niagara Falls that weekend while scooping me up, so it just worked and now I get the chance to check it out before even settling in. Score!

Since Niagara Falls is such a huge Canadian staple, we tend to hear about it quite a few times in our lifetimes. Here are some dumb and random things that go through my mind when thinking of Niagara Falls:

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Here’s me and little brother in our matching outfits.

One: My first recollection of any kind of family vacation was going to Niagara Falls and Canada’s Wonderland in the mid ‘80s. I was the tender age of five or something and at that time I only had one brother – I have two younger.

My mom and aunt were both seamstresses, and as order falls in any Asian family and for basically anything, my brother and I were used as guinea pigs. They tinkered and played with patterns for children’s clothing, so naturally my little bro and I had matching outfits parading through vacation, because why buy two different fabric prints right? Ugh. Lol!

Two: That scene in the 1980s Superman II movie when that stupid kid who was playing on the railing lost his grip and fell into the falls. Obviously because it was a Superman movie, Clark Kent runs and hides while taking off his glasses and top layer of clothing – so no one would know he was Superman of course – and saves the day.

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Man, if I had been that kid, Superman would have had to come back and save me a second time – this time from my parents trying to beat me to death because I almost died! Asian parents….

Three: For the majority of my life I’ve pronounced it incorrectly. From since I could remember I’ve pronounced it “Na-yeg-ra,” and have spelt it as: Niagra, but only recently have I noticed that it’s actually spelled: Niagara. Then why the hell don’t we pronounce it as “Na-ye-gara?” Or maybe we do… I don’t know, but I blame it on that stupid song – which brings me to the next point.

Four:  The Everyone Loves Marineland song – basically Canada’s second national anthem:

“… Niagara Falls Ontario
Is always a fun place to go
Seeing friends you miss
A great big kiss
Everyone loves Marineland.”

I swear this song was etched into every ‘80s and ‘90s Canadian child’s head!

Five: Nagaraya Cracker Nuts. Have you ever had these? They’re like crack, but for a while I pronounced it incorrectly –even though it said it right on the damn bag if I had just took the time to read. I called them “Niagra nuts,” and yes as previously stated, even that was face palm worthy wrong. Lol!

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6ix: I need to find this sweater in my current size so I can do a “then and now” shot in Niagara Falls. Anyone know where I can find it? Lol!

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I can’t believe how quickly September 30th is coming! Wake me up when…. yeah, yeah, yeah!

Flipped-turned upside down

Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I’d like to take a minute
Just sit right there…

The countdown began at 12:41 a.m. today – almost 24 hours ago. That’s when I clicked on the confirmation button to run my credit card and claim a seat on that Boeing 737 departing from Winnipeg and landing in Hamilton on September 30th.

I don’t even know what really came over me. I just decided to go ahead and buy my one-way ticket out of nowhere, but one thing I know for sure is that it just got 100% real!

Basically I have 37 days – that’s a month and a week – and really, that’s just a blink of an eye. It goes by quick!

I remember at the stroke of midnight on August 1st, I said to myself, “Happy Birthday, enjoy it in Winnipeg because in just two months you’ll be in Toronto,” and now we’re here, at the halfway point.

However, 37 days is not when my life gets “flipped-turned upside down,” – that shit’s now! In just 37 days I still have to: sell off some furniture; sell my car; renew my passport; pack; ship a couple of boxes of personal belongings; MC a wedding; and obviously spend some QT with loved ones, all while working through my last month.

I literally have no time to have second thoughts. Wish me luck! LOL!

 

 

 

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